Don't Touch my Boobs & Thighs, Man: We are in a Night Bus, Not a Hotel Room

One of my night trips in 2012. A man tried touching me on this particular night!

My three years stay in Bamenda has been characterized by three years of long distance night travels to the South West, Littoral, and Center Regions. The desire to travel to these places either for work, school, or visiting is always marred by the thoughts of "who is going to sit next to me tonight." I scrutinize, with my eyes, every male passenger that steps in looking at his ticket to locate his bus seat. If its a guy, my jaws drop. Sad to say some men are mean enough to sexually harass women in public buses. Even in the discomfort of my tight traveling jean pants and thick protective jackets, these men have always sought to find their comfort in that situation. While I make conscious effort to protect myself from the night's cold by wearing long and thick clothing, some sexual harassers make conscious efforts to use a woman's body as their heaters throughout the entire long night journey. The turning off of the internal bus lights as the bus hits the road has become a nightmare to most women in Cameroon. 

On several occasions, I have felt the cold hands of different guys, sliding through my thighs and boobs in the middle of my sleep as the bus glides. Who would have imagined, that a man in his right senses would want to touch a woman he met in a night bus. Is this how mean some men have become. My first experience is one to remember, as I shouted in the middle of the night, to the top of my voice "Stop touching me, you fool!" My voice was loud to wake up almost all of the passengers who were already enjoying their sleep, but disappointingly, the driver didn't stop to ask about what was going on. Is it that he understood what was going on? Or that he has experienced that too often to the point where he doesn't consider it an issue? Well, for me, that was a big issue. At first I thought I was dreaming as the cold cement-paper hands started its rough moves, and then I realized it was an embarrassing reality.

Preparing for a night trip: Got my tight pants and long shirt on!

About two months ago, one little girl's experience of how she was sexually harassed as a 13 year old in a night bus has left me pained at what our girl children are going through during rentrer scolaire periods. We were in a bus, traveling from Buea to Bamenda on a normal  trip during the day and the bus was full to capacity. The little girl, who is about 20 years old now explained her ordeal.

This girl, whom I prompted to explain what happened to her as she initiated a discussion on her experience in a bus when she was just 13. She said a man old enough to be his father touched her sexually. 

"When I was in form two, I used to travel alone from Muyuka to Bamenda to attend school at PSS Mankon. One day, the 70-seater bus carried more than 70 passengers and as a result some passengers did not have seats -- they had to stand from Muyuka to Bamenda. After covering more than half (about 150km) of the journey the bus stopped at the popular 'kemkem' for people to rest, eat, and ease themselves. When the bus was about to take off, a man that had been standing close to my seat begged that he sit while i sit on his leg since I was small. Being a small and naive little girl I accepted. The bus took off and before I knew I fell deep asleep and like a daughter sitting on her fathers lap on a long journey, I found comfort on his body. Surprisingly, in the middle of the night, I felt this man's hands going down my vagina path, I got up, and he whispered in my ears that I should stay quiet and enjoy it. I became so tensed, but I couldn't talk. He had unzipped my trousers without me knowing and my zip was completely down. A man I can call my father, let me call him my father was sexually touching me. Unable to bear the trauma and stress of the night, I quietly got off his body and made a sit on the floor on the middle lane of the bus where others were sitting because they had no seats. That is one experience I will never forget," she explained.

Now, that was a courageous young girl, who was able to take that decisive step to step out of the mans lap and make a seat on the floor of the bus. Think about some of our shy daughters and or young girls who would find it difficult to take such decisions. They will definitely be violated and that experience will traumatize them for the rest of their lives. Let's think of how many of our children travel such long distances during school reopening. The girls are obviously victims of this evident malpractice. 

The issue of sexual harassment has been talked about and penned down by female bloggers who have lived the experience. Visit Commy Mussa's blog on this same subject http://sisterspeak237.com/journey-by-night-a-womans-nightmare/ . 

It should be noted that the distance from Bamenda to Buea/Douala/Yaounde ranges from between 350 - 400km. And this can be a big bore to a woman sitting next to a sexual psychopath. Something needs to be done.

It should also be noted that not all men harass women in night buses. There are still decent men out there.

If you are planning a night trip, have this in mind:

1.  Don't cancel your night trip because you read this blog
2. Be courageous and have it in mind that you might be sitting next to a man who will sexually harass you
3. Don't sleep out, especially when you are sitting next to a guy, you can never tell
4. Speak out when it happens, alert the bus driver and his aid
5. Shout if you can to let others know
6. Wear trousers and covered blouses to avoid easy access especially if you have to sleep. This will enable you to regain consciousness before the act goes deep
7. Generally, if your are traveling by night in Cameroon, remember to hold as many warm clothing accessories as possible (wraps, pullovers/sweaters, socks) because if you are lucky to sit beside a civilized man, you may be unlucky to find yourself in a dilapidated bus with holes all over. And the cold breeze coming from outside from such a bus can make travel hell for you if your are not protected. 
8. Safe travels!